Jacify My Statement.

Feeling surreal, having only a few hours of undisturbed sleep. I felt replenished, uncanny. Probably due to the fact that Sly is back, like a pillar that was missing (when he was away), was finally filling the cold place.

Work has been cool, with the hours bestowed to me, I have less to worry about; the PR application of course. I have not exactly reached the desired amount but my feeling has got less tensed.

Resumes had been sent with errors, mistake on my part. But lena's mum's words consoled me, that I shouldn't be worried. My mum's word taunted me in my dire state of mind.
"If is meant to be, IT will happened", she said.

Never a believer of her words but that's the only thing I survived on, for now at least.

I learnt to not hold onto something that only makes me upset. Too shy to admit I am in rock bottom. Hence, why I like to stay home and mull over my morbid thoughts. Had been throwing my concentration on form fillings and leisure reading, it seems to take my mind off the desperation I felt. Not being to work in my field due to my residency status, is not something I should mopped on. Bitter, I know.

People urged me to enjoy my holiday, and I very much wish to. But it seems senseless and guilty to do. I know I should take a break after 16 years of studying. 16 long dreary years. Time really fly pass, don't they? And now, I am standing at my cross road, waiting for a sign. A sign to light the unknown path that I should embark on. My instincts have worn out and I doubt my judgement every now and then.

Thanks Domo for being around and being ever so supporting to my reckless, careless and lack of foresight. He has been amazing but I need to deal with this emo-ness alone.

Thanks bird for being ever so understanding and Sze, you are definitely not forgotten, you tide me through my waves of insecurity. Von has been really supportive, as usual.

I have all the things and people I want/need, what more do I need to succeed?

Opportunity.